Mary Ellen (Donaldson) Heinemann

04/20/1939 - 09/13/2025

Mary Ellen (Donaldson) Heinemann's prayers were answered on September 13, 2025 when she died peacefully at Bethany House in Auburn, Alabama.

Mary was born April 20, 1939 in Geneva, Alabama — the first child of Ramsey and Esther Merritt, who were barely more than children themselves and still struggling with the Great Depression. Mary was happiest when she was taking care of others. At an early age this showed in her care for her three younger siblings — Jerry (deceased), Jan, and Greg. Sissy's dedication to caring for her siblings was always evident.

Mary was a decisive woman. When she realized nursing was the path for her, Mary left home for a year to work in a garment factory until she earned the tuition to attend nursing school in Columbus, Georgia. Once she decided on a course she was committed to seeing it through and she focused on excelling at her nursing training. Still, Mary feared she would never become a nurse. Thanks to an observant instructor and Mary's stubbornness, she discovered she could do the required math when she relied on her mind instead of pen and paper.

Once she became a nurse, Mary returned to south Alabama where she married Oneal Donaldson (deceased) and finally had children of her own, Pam Coxwell and Tammy Martin.

As a nurse she advanced to hold positions as director of nurses and then administrator before retiring. She served in hospitals and nursing homes in Dothan, Opelika, and Anniston Alabama and ended her career in Fort Smith Arkansas. While working in Opelika in the late 1970s she established East Alabama Medical Center's first Specialized Nursing Facility (SNF) unit, which grew into Arbor Springs. Mary's nursing work was her calling and she held herself and others to a rigorous standard. Nothing could rile Mary up like the thought of elderly people being taken advantage of, and she was devoted to protecting them in her nursing homes, regardless of their family's ability to advocate for them.

When preparing to retire, Mary returned to south Alabama to be near her mother, Esther. Eventually Mary gave in to Esther's repeated requests and met the "young man who also loved dancing" — Robert (Bob) Heinemann (deceased), the love of Mary's life. When they married in 2000, Mary's life shifted into a season of celebration and joy. For her family, there is a clear line before-Bob and after-Bob. Her beloved Bob, his children, grandchildren, and family brought joy to her life in a way she had never expected.

During retirement, Mary developed her love for acrylic painting and creative sewing. She greatly enjoyed painting historic buildings in Eufaula and Abbeville, Alabama where she and Bob lived together on Lake Eufaula. She also enjoyed teaching her granddaughters how to sew, watching her grandsons grow into strong, thoughtful young men, and marveling at her great-grandson.

For those of you who met Mary during the last six years of her illness, thank you for loving her and receiving her love in return. You gave her a cherished opportunity to continue doing what always mattered most to her — taking care of others. You met a sweet, sometimes feisty, woman who loved God and treasured every interaction with you. But you did not meet Mary in her fullness. Thankfully, you can still know her through the legacy she left. Whether you're family by genetics, choice, friendship, or simply caring for her, we each have something we learned from Mary that stays with us.

She is survived by her siblings, Jan (Perry) Bush and Greg (Janice) Jordan; daughters, Pam (Terry) Coxwell and Tammy (Greg) Martin; grandchildren, Ashley (Stephen) Walker, Allana Coxwell, Ryan Martin, Daniel Martin, Luke Martin; great-grandson, Micah Coxwell; many nieces, nephews, great-nieces, great nephews, her beloved Heinemann family, and former colleagues.

The memorial for her life and legacy will be at 2pm on Saturday, September 20, 2025 at Frederick-Dean funeral home. Visitation at 1pm.

In her life, Mary cared for many family members and patients during their final days. We were honored to care for her during her final days and grateful to the staff at Lakewood Assisted Living, EAMC, Arbor Springs, and Bethany House for the honor they showed her. Thank you.

In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations to Bethany House of Auburn, Alabama through Hospice Angels at compassus.com

Frederick-Dean Funeral Home is assisting the family with arrangements.